“habits are the compound interest of self-improvement."
——— james clear, atomic habits
i read the book atomic habits last year and started to practice developing good habits through the four steps feedback loop, which has been very successful. for example, i write personal life journals every day like free writing with any random thoughts in my mind during the day, highlight - write using a pen, not typing. i am old school and like writing either on paper or on my ipad. the touch and the feeling grounded me to mindfully think through what i experienced today, what's in my mind, and how i feel at the moment.
Cue – make it obvious
Craving – make it attractive
Response – make it easy
Reward – make it satisfying
developing a habit is not easy. there are days i just don't want to do it and feel journalling is a burden, because when i was little, i hated writing diaries when my mom asked me to do, no matter how pretty the notebook was. whenever it happened, i asked myself to just write down one sentence, or one word. #3 - make it easy, it really helps to make sure no matter what, do the thing, practice and repeat it until it becomes a habit. then, i'll reward myself with something i wanted to do, sometimes my guilty interests like scrolling through shopping websites, checking instagram, etc. such rewards can help me crave the good habit more, because i know if i do it next time, i'll be rewarded with something i want. plus, practicing good habits does make me feel more fulfilled afterward.
the four-step practice opened my door to developing good habits, until the habit itself becomes less enjoyable - another type of burden. for people who like to stay in a routine and are not good at dealing with life contingencies, the day when you didn't do the 'good habits', you could feel anxious, or it became a trigger to something else. for example, i usually write journal in the evening at an office space, after finishing work of the day and before dinner. i felt anxious and annoyed yesterday when i pushed myself to write, even though it was late that night, i felt tired after work and just wanted to go back to my room and watch netflix. i was anxious because i was afraid the habit would be gone if i didn't do it. i was annoyed because i just didn't want to write that time.
i decided to open my journal and told myself: "just write down one sentence or one word, you will call it a day and go back enjoy your netflix".
i wrote: i'm annoyed right now and i just want to go back to my apartment.
until i wrote the magic word - why?
my mind started to flow and try to find out why i had so many negative emotions about a good habit. i realized i should trust myself that the habit is already part of me. i am the master of my own habit and capable of making it more agile, flexible and fun. if i didn't want to journal at my routine time, it's ok. i probably will have a lot to write in the evening before bed, or the next morning. like i don't need to push or remind myself to eat. i'll miss a meal sometimes or eat at a weird time, but i don't feel annoyed or anxious by not following my routine or doing the 'habit'. it's already part of me and i don't need to spend extra mental energy to think about it. when i eat, i fully enjoy the food, the taste, the smell, without thinking i missed my meal earlier.
so i opened the book atomic habits again and reread some chapters, now with a better understanding of what it means by “compound interest of self-improvement". keyword: interest - to make it fun so that i want to make it part of me.
developing a good habit requires self discipline and activation energy at the beginning, but once you find or make it enjoyable, it will automatically become part of you and your identity.
habits are fun. enjoy the journey, not the goal.
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